Ask Deanna
Relationship For 11 Years And No Marriage
By Deanna M.
Nov 29, 2009 - 7:37:09 AM

Ask Deanna!

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Ask Deanna! Is an advice column known for its fearless approach to reality-based subjects!


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Dear Deanna!


I'm 33 years old and have been in a relationship for 11 years.  We both are ready to get married but my boyfriend wants to wait.  He says our finances aren’t in order but I think he’s lying.  What do you think?


Confused                                Columbia, S.C.


Dear Confused:


You both are lying.  He’s living a lie because after 11 years, there should’ve been a marriage of love with or without finances.  Married couples build together.  He’s very comfortable and has no plans to marry you and will use excuse after excuse.  You’re lying to yourself in believing he’ll marry you.  With your age and the time you’ve been in the relationship, you should know the status of your finances.  You both need to come together, lay your cards on the table and decide to commit or split and keep it moving.


Dear Deanna!


My neighbor really upsets me by the way she puts her children on the church bus on Sunday morning.  She comes out in her robe with a cigarette in her mouth and sends her kids to church but she doesn’t go with them.  This makes me so mad that I’m at the point of knocking on her door so I can tell her about herself.  Would I be wrong for doing this?


LaTanya                                            Oklahoma City, Okla.


Dear LaTanya:


Don’t be foolish by going to that woman’s house and get yourself knocked out.  People tend to be touchy when you come at them the wrong way concerning religion.  Her business is her business but as a Christian, you should invite her and the children to come to church with you instead of judging her current actions.  God wants you to do his work by seeking the unsought, teaching the untaught and bringing the unbrought.


Dear Deanna!


I just graduated from high school and started college.  I haven’t gone to class since the first semester began.  I’m tired of school, but my family forced me to go to college so I went along with the plan.  Now I feel guilty because of the money spent on tuition and the loans.  How do I tell them I want to drop out?


Talisha                                                Atlanta, Ga.


Dear Talisha:


It’s good your conscience is kicking your behind.  You need to wake up and realize you’re blessed to go to college when so many people can’t go because they can’t afford it.  You need to change your mind and do the right thing and stay in school.  Seek assistance from your guidance counselors and talk with your parents and get yourself back on track.  In the long run, you’ll greatly benefit as an educated adult with a degree.  If not, prepare to say, may I take your order please?




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