Zany Phone Messages
Posted by Rosana Clarkson on Jul 12, 2009 - 11:40:18 PM
LOS ANGELES—Bored? So am I. If you have nothing better to do than to slap mosquitoes off your arms this season or make prank calls to your boss, try recording a list of sarcastic phone messages, and then decide on your own if you actually want to use them. At your own risk, of course.
1) Why, hello! I find it a very painful inconvenience to be bothered at this time. So leave a message with your name, number and the time you called, and I will be mildly happy, to return your call, whenever I wake up, and, whenever I feel like it.
2) Hello, there. I really appreciate your call. I am not available at the moment, so leave a message with your name, number and the time you called, at your earliest convenience, have a nice day, and...all of that polite stuff I don't really mean, leave a message.
3) If you are (friend's name), leave a message. If you're a telemarketer please hang up. If you're a debt collector, uh. (Uncomfortable, nervous coughing). Everybody else leave a message.
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