Dear Lily
Secret Operation, Tempered Boyfriend, and Disapproving Dad
By Lily O'Hara
Oct 1, 2004 - 11:40:00 AM

Dear Lily:

I am going to have an operation to end my childbearing days, because I already have five children and my husband and I are divorced. I find this a little hard to come to grips with because I am now engaged to a wonderful man who has never had any children nor has he ever been married. Should I discuss this with him before going through with the operation?

Louise, mother hubbard.

Dear Louise:

You should by all means discuss this with him, after all he is marrying you because he loves you and may expect his own children from you. Always be honest with your intended partner because it takes two to make a marriage work.

Yours truly,

Dear Lily:

I have been going with a handsome, delightful man for three years, but at times he just can't keep his temper with others. He gets very violent. He scares me sometimes more than I like, but he has never been violent with me.
Should I trust he will not be abusive after we are married?

Scared Silly Sally

Dear Sally:

This boyfriend of yours is a little immature, and at his age, it may be permanent. Talk him into getting psychiatric help or leave him. Never marry with the hope you can change him, it never works.

Good Luck

Dear Lily:

My father doesn't like my boyfriend, but I love him. I also love my father and know that he would never do or say anything that will hurt my relationship with others. This just seems to be the isolated case. Why doesn't he just let me judge for myself, after all I am nineteen and old enough to know better.

Love that Guy Mary Lee

Dear Mary Lee:

Give your father the benefit of the doubt and let him get to know this guy better. Try not to be sexually involved with your boyfriend, so your mind will be able to see just why your father objects to the boy. After all your father does love you and wants the best for his daughter.

Wishing you the best answers in life,

Dear Lily:

I go to my dentist frequently to have my teeth taken care of, but now my dentist tells me that I am wearing off the enamel on my teeth because I brush too often. He wants to put a veneer on my teeth or bond them. Do you think he is doing this just to make money or do I need the work? He has been my dentist for ten years.

Smiling Sally

Dear Sally:

Your dentist has treated you for a long time. Usually I would say trust him. But if you have doubts about his ability, get a second opinion. Then you will know how good he has been with you. Don't tell the second dentist why you are seeing him, just ask if your enamel needs to be treated and why.


Dear Lily:

My husband is one of the nicest people in the world to others, but he is nasty to me. He hasn't always been this way, just the last twenty years. We have been married for forty-one years. What can I do to bring my lover back?

Lonely in California

Dear Terri:

What have you been doing to lose his love. Are you the same woman he married? Try talking to him about how he treats you. You might just get some interesting insight.


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