Dear Lily: August 2003
By Lily O'Hara
Aug 1, 2003 - 4:25:00 PM
Last night my husband asked for a divorce. I couldn't understand why. We have been married for 25 years and he has never cheated on me, nor have I ever cheated on him. Our married life consisted of four children, 10 grandchildren and happy memories. When I asked him why he wanted out of our marriage, he said he was tired of marriage and wanted his freedom; no excuses, no reasons, no complaints. Isn't the seven-year itch about due? I will not give him a divorce until he tells me why he wants one. Am I being unreasonable? What do you think I should do?
Alone in a crowd
Sit him down and talk to him about how you feel. Ask him to tell you if there is someone else he wants to live with. Ask him what he wants out of life. If he is just feeling the empty nest syndrome, I can understand how he feels. I think you should tell him you want to go away with him for a vacation before you make a decision. He owes it to you. I hope this vacation will wake him up to what he will be missing without you.
Only the best to you
I have been paying for my college tuition by working nights in a restaurant, but I make so little that I can't pay for my room and board, let alone for the high cost of tuition. I heard that I might be able to get a grant for my classes or borrow enough to live on and pay for my classes. Where do I go for advice or help? My parents cannot help me out, they are disabled and retired. Thanks in advance.
Down on her luck
The best place to get help is at your university administration department. They have a financial department to assist their students. If you can't get help there, find a student that is in America on a grant and they will tell you how easy it was for them to get a grant and loans. They can also help you. I find that the colleges are really overpriced, but the best way to go is on scholarships that they give out every year to deserving students.
I wish you luck
I found out that I have cancer and it terrifies me. I haven't told my family yet, but the treatments will be enough for them to know sooner or later.
I am so frightened, Lily. How do I face this new catastrophe? Please advise.
Your family must be informed as soon as possible. They deserve to be your support group. Please don't worry excessively for it will not have a good effect on your illness. Cancer can be cured if treated in time. You and your husband go to the doctor and talk to him. I wish you a healthy recovery. Tell me how things are going with you. You are going to be okay.
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