Edge of the West
When Chips Are Down, They Play The Clinton Card
By Ron Scott Smith
Jul 10, 2005 - 7:33:00 PM

WASHINGTON D.C.If you think it's tough being you, how would you like to be poor Sean Hannity these days?


In the name of all that's right for America, he and his ilk of super-patriots have recently been reduced to rolling out reports of how Chelsea Clinton is a "rape-child," the victim of her daddy forcing himself upon her mommy. That's just about how bleak it's gotten for the conservative media lock-steppers nowadays in an America firmly under the rule of their own types - from the White House down through both houses of Congress and the Supreme Court - a righteous hierarchy that desperately attempts to hold onto the old order while a nation relentlessly evolves beyond them right before their very eyes.


That's right, there was Hannity the other day spraying this new Clinton poison all over America's airwaves, promising he would never stoop so low as to use it while telling us all about it.  That Bill raped Hillary and thus begot Chelsea according to Hannity, comes from a book climbing up the Amazon bestseller list, "The Truth About Hillary: What She Knew, When She Knew It, and How Far She'll Go to Become President."  God help Hillary and us all, it's still three-and-a-half years until the next presidential election.


You know, it must be a daunting task to continually have to spin a train wreck into a good thing.  Like the one that jumped the tracks in Iraq where our kids get picked off daily when their reason for being there is based on faulty intelligence crafted around a pre-conceived policy that had us going to war with Saddam come hell or high water.  High water has yet to be found but the hell thing has fully arrived in a war that is nothing less than an unconscionable catastrophe. You try defending that thing for going on for three years, and tell me you wouldn't jump at the chance to talk about Hillary getting raped by Bill.


You try defending torture at Abu Ghraib, institutionalized kidnapping at Guantanamo and the creation of an Iraqi insurgency so fierce it seems on the verge of blowing the face right off of its own newly liberated country.  You try defending an ongoing Afghanistan occupation - where opium crops are now harvested at record levels, and where the Taliban are slowly coming back, bad as ever.  As their own insurgent rebellion begins to take hold, that bunch recently attacked and overran a remote district in southern Afghanistan, then shot down a Chinook helicopter killing all 17 American troops on board.  This is a hard, mean crew, as they proved to the Russians some years ago with our help and Bin Laden's.  Anyone who thought they would lie down and let intruders have their way over the long run is naïve, stupid or both.


You try defending all that along with the price of gas, the dismantling of social security and John Bolton, too, and tell me you wouldn't rush back to the tried and true Clinton-bashing that got you to your multi-million dollar salary in the first place.


Axis-of-evil?  They don't seem to be talking that talk much anymore. North Korea would appear to be a ripe subject for colorful national chat, yet none of them goes near it.  In June, North Korea's top envoy to the stalled nuclear disarmament talks boasted that his country was building "more nuclear bombs," and was able to mount nuclear warheads onto their formidable arsenal of missiles.  "I should say that we have enough nuclear bombs; as for specifically how many we have, that is a secret."  Wait a minute.  We don't allow secrets like that, do we?


This North Korea bunch is getting right up in the president's face.  Kim Jong Il recently called him "a half-baked man" who has "turned the world into a sea of blood," and demanded the United States declare it has no "hostile intent" toward North Korea as a pre-condition for returning to the disarmament talks. This prompted one of our senior State Department officials to fire back, somewhat less than menacingly, "We don't want to be reduced to a sort of circus animal doing an act, being told to jump through hoops at the behest of the North Koreans."  He really had to put us in the same sentence as circus animals jumping through hoops?  Just to keep it real, Kim Jong Il then went on to announce that in the future they will only discuss mutual nuclear disarmament if they talk to the United States, rather than one-sided abandonment of the weapons. But really, how can you or I, Hannity or Bush, argue with the inherent survival instinct built into that notion?


Go ahead, Hannity, Limbaugh and all the rest. You too Armor. Try to keep the pride and bluster up while defending this stuff day in and day out.

There is a silver lining though. As Larry Elder, another of the Bush radio lackeys, put it to a sympathetic listener who fretted over the newfound difficulties facing conservatives: "The good news, in light of it all is, at least the President got reelected."  At least that.

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