Night School 99: Too Much Love
Posted by Grady Miller on Dec 22, 2012 - 8:16:47 AM
subscribed to Mylanta Platinum Plus on behalf of loved ones,” said the robed
figure, framed by the dazzling view of the Hollywood hills outside the law
Plus?” mumbled Harvey, arching a bushy eyebrow.
Mylanta's masterpiece, Oneness, tailored to a single individual. When you
subscribe to Platinum Plus, this magical transformative book shifts and changes
with a person's life and thoughts. The foundation has a vast network of
'revealers' who collect information about the candidate's enlightenment and
quandaries, hopes and worries. So, like a river, the book is always changing,
ever relevant to the person being surveyed. The revealers are the antenna, the
eyes and ears. Hence, so many people think that Mylanta, who left us in
physical form, many years ago, speaks directly to them because he is listening.
In a very real way, it is true. Our guide and teacher always pointed out that
listening is more important than speaking. Why else would God have given us one
mouth and two ears?”
jaw dropped. “I had one of those books. I gave it to Candy. She started
reading, and it was in Spanish. But when I saw it a few days ago, now it's
turned to English.”
you go. It reflects her inner state,” the robed one declared. “Candy is ready,
like the caterpillar, to transform from larva into the butterfly.”
have to hire a new team of spies to follow Candy?” Jason asked.
such a vulgar term,” said the robed one. “We call them revealers. And yes, as a
matter of fact, we had to hire a whole new team to manage Candy. And this has
duplicated our claims against the Katselas estate.”
felt guilty, for it was he who had ripped the book in two, thrown it in a
gutter, in a pique. Then later given half to Candy to foster her enlightenment.
“Who was watching me?” Jason asked shortly. “Officer Matamoros?”
would be a breach of confidentiality,” said the robed one.
gives me the creeps. Was that half-wit, Childers, in the school parking lot
watching me? Janet Gilmore? Is that why she disappeared from our school?”
wasn't the budget cutbacks in her case. We assigned her to cover someone new in
Morocco,” the robed one admitted. And added: “You didn't hear that.”
to having Hollywood in his palm, Harvey was befuddled by all this, his bushy
eyebrows working overtime. The robed one spoke, his countenance exuding bliss
and serenity, “Mylanta believed each individual had need for his own special
wisdom, that's why he developed Mylanta Plus.”
interrupted, “So the Foundation sticks it to people for that individualized
like a tailored suit.”
million dollar suit,” Jason moaned.
bring this to arbitration,” Harvey suggested.
you they will decide in the Foundation's favor,” said the robed one. “I have
all the signed papers and contracts in my briefcase. Suzanne knew what she was
raised his arms and gazed up at the office ceiling and said, “Suzanne, you
loved us too much, you did some kooky thing like sign up for Platinum Plus
Mylanta. Too much love, sweet Suzanne.
learning the unpleasant truth that her estate teetered on bankruptcy, it was
still a lively period for Jason. There was a great outpouring of kindness for
him as Suzanne's official widower. Isabel, their old baby sitter who lived on
Yucca Ave., promised to help care for Kit, his daughter. She was as good as her
word, and Candy also helped out. Ands before word got our that Suzanne's estate
was frittered away, and forfeited to the Mylanta Foundation because of her
mystical penchant, a number of gold-digging and hot young actresses sought him
the chance to date that had been denied him, and strangely, he became more
giving with his daughter though he had far less to give than the public could