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Bad Movie Night

Barebones Script Meets a Killer Skeleton
Bad Movie Night
By Socrates Crenshaw and Orlando W. Harris on Jun 11, 2004 - 8:07:00 PM
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 Every once in a while, a movie of a lifetime comes along, filled with drama, love, comedy, and probing questions into the very nature and existence of Mankind. This was not that film.

  Not Your Garden Variety Blood Gnomes
Bad Movie Night
By Socrates Crenshaw and Orlando W. Harris on Jun 4, 2004 - 7:24:00 PM
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There's a war going on in Gnome-man's land. 

CG Dragons and Bleached Teeth
Bad Movie Night
By Socrates Crenshaw and Orlando W. Harris on May 28, 2004 - 6:27:00 PM
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Check out the verdict on this week's bad movie, "Dragon Fighter." It's no "Dragonheart," though. 

  Chupacabras Chupa Something Worse than Cabras
Bad Movie Night
By Socrates Crenshaw and Orlando W. Harris on May 21, 2004 - 7:15:00 PM

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If we ever find the scum that forced "Bloodthirst: The Legend of the Chupacabras" on us, we'll raise the red flag, light a barrel of gunpowder under them and merrily send them to Davey Jones' Locker.



Yellowbeard: The Id Has Its Posterchild
Bad Movie Night
By Socrates Crenshaw and Orlando W. Harris on May 14, 2004 - 7:04:00 PM
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As one of the Monty Python troupe, Chapman set the tone for his film acting by playing the protagonist in every Python film. "Yellowbeard" is no exception. 

  High on the High Desert: A Revelation from Orlando
Bad Movie Night
By Relayed by Orlando W. Harris; made fit for consumption by Socrates Crenshaw on Apr 30, 2004 - 7:40:00 PM

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No movie this week, but Orlando tells of his adventures in the desert.



Limeys and Lycos
Bad Movie Night
By Socrates Crenshaw and Orlando W. Harris on Apr 23, 2004 - 11:40:00 PM
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What do you get when you mix British commandos, British Special Forces and werewolves? That's right, no plot. "Dog Soldiers" is a perfect blend of the three. But having no plot leaves the path wide open to ceaseless killing and violence of every sort.

  Jack Frost 2: Revenge of the Mutant Killer Snowman
Bad Movie Night
By Socrates Crenshaw and Orlando W. Harris on Feb 20, 2004 - 8:40:00 AM

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This movie haunted us so much we had to stay up bowling 'til 5 in the morning, stone cold sober. The lows in this film are so low they become inverse, negative highs.



Love and Romance in the Jungle: Rambo First Blood Part II
Bad Movie Night
By Socrates Crenshaw and Orlando W. Harris on Feb 4, 2004 - 12:21:00 AM

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This is a movie that pulled in $700 million in adjusted gross. That's "Titanic" territory, and this doesn't even have Winslet's breasts.

 



  Voodoo Magic, Vousdoux girls, and Cats in Heat
Bad Movie Night
By Socrates Crenshaw and Orlando W. Harris on Dec 1, 2003 - 11:53:00 AM
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Ahh, remember the good ol' days of Crytpz? Well, flip that DVD over baby and enjoy (or not!) Ragdoll.

The Yin and Yang of Shaolin Dolemite
Bad Movie Night
By Socrates Crenshaw and Orlando W. Harris on Nov 1, 2003 - 3:52:00 PM
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It was the best of movies, it was the worst of movies. Just reflect on the title itself- Shaolin Dolemite- every syllable dripping with ambrosia drenched promise. Blaxploitation meets chop-socky. "Sho-nuff!" meets "Hiya!" The yin and yang of bad movies, needing only some god awful monster dripping pus and slime from Planet X or the Ninth Dimension to fulfill a most unholy triumvirate.


  Down a Few for Delta Delta Die
Bad Movie Night
By Socrates Crenshaw and Orlando W. Harris on Oct 1, 2003 - 9:04:00 AM

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For Pete's Sake...someone please email Socrates and Orlando so they can continue their oh so meaningful lives of reviewing movies like Delta Delta Die!



Sasquatch: Man and Beast Reconcile
Bad Movie Night
By Socrates Crenshaw & Orlando Harris on Sep 1, 2003 - 9:46:00 PM
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Normally when a movie is bad, there is something redeeming about it. Either there's violence, nudity, or dialogue so bad that you can't stop laughing. But Sasquatch had none of these.

  Werewolves Galore in The Howling II
Bad Movie Night
By Socrates Crenshaw and Orlando W. Harris on Aug 1, 2003 - 3:19:00 PM
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The Howling II: Your Sister is a Werewolf; no we're not kidding, that's the real title. They must have had a team of highly trained monkey writers working round the clock on this one.

Sorority House Massacre 2
Bad Movie Night
By Socrates Crenshaw and Orlando W. Harris on Jul 1, 2003 - 11:12:00 PM
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Wow. Don't know how Socrates and Orlando do it. They've sat through another bad movie and lived to tell about it. This time, its Sorority House Massacre 2.


  "Ginger Snaps": Not So Bad
Bad Movie Night
By Socrates Crenshaw and Orlando W. Harris on Jun 1, 2003 - 4:59:00 PM
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Socrates and Orlando have found Ginger Snaps to review this month. This movie is really too good for a bad movie night. I still don't know whether to be pleased at how good the movie is or disappointed that it wasn't awful and cheesy.

Bad Movies Return: "Cryptz"
Bad Movie Night
By Socrates Crenshaw and Orlando W. Harris on May 1, 2003 - 11:05:00 AM
Cryptz_Movie.jpg
Cryptz just jumped off the racks and into our hands. It seemed to have everything: strippers, vampires, vampire strippers, struggling rappers, mystic symbols and hocus-pocus, a little kung fu and the token mystic spiritual warrior. We've all seen bad movies, but probably none as bad as this one.


 
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Serving Bel Air, Benedict Canyon, Beverly Hills. Brentwood, Laurel Canyon, Los Feliz, Malibu, Pacific Palisades, Melrose, Santa Monica, Sherman Oaks, Studio City, Topanga, Canyon, Westwood & Hollywood Hills.