UNITED STATES—It was Miller’s own rapacious nature, so well masked under fictions noted for humor and humanity, that put Cuba on his Geopolitical radar, years after it being on his literary radar. Cuba was estranged from the U.S., so close and yet too far to hug. An outsize presence in the things that really counted, poetry and music, to Miller. Cuba was like Miller himself, he could land in Guantanamo and feel it a part of the soil, the toil of dealing with the chucklehead culture, of a crass but beautiful place land of liberty.

Three times there had been American occupations of Cuba (1898-1902) after the U.S.S. Maine exploded in Havana Harbor, under shady circumstances. A military government was set up as Spain and the U.S. worked out a joint peace. Spain ceded to the United States Guam, Puerto Rico and the Philippines, and Spain relinquished any control over Cuba. The second Cuban occupation (1906-1909) was after the collapse of the first elected president of the island nation. Theodore Roosevelt sent troops to look after American interests and see that the Cubans did not butcher each other, which was not in the U.S. best interest. Such a bloodbath would deplete the supply of workers and customers, too.

For sure by the second occupation some of the Marines had heard from those who went earlier, what a beautiful place Cuba was and how they wanted to go back someday.

For a few someday came earlier than expected. In 1917 commenced the third occupation of Cuba.  The U.S.S. Paducah (named for native tribes in the lands west of the Mississippi who were exterminated by the Europeans) steamed into Guantanamo Bay, paving the way for an American base, a veteran gunboat that escorted Navy ships and patrolled the Caribbean.

In 1917 the Cuban government formally invited the US army to train in a warm climate. As guests of the government, the US troops were obliged to stay in strict limits. The US Marines assumed responsibility for maintaining the security of sugar plantations and the equipment. They soon established a number of permanent camps. Already in November 1917, the presence of the troops caused anti-American protests (unwelcome committees). More troops poured in. The troops patrolled the countryside to ensure that sugar plantations were safe. Also, they picked up “intelligence,” tried to obtain general information and pass it to the United States, as well as to authorities in Havana. They were instructed to fully cooperate with local authorities, in order to minimize frictions in Cuban-American relations. The Cuban people remained hostile to the Marines, sometimes casting eyes down or trying not to look at their khaki tunics buttoned to the top as they patrolled various cities.

In 1918, partially as a result of the American interference, Cuba produced a record sugar harvest.

By mid-1918, the disturbance in the countryside ceased, and the main threat to sugar production was coming from the protests in the cities, mostly in form of strikes, which in particular targeted warehouses for shipping and production of sugar. These protests were particularly strong in 1918 and 1919, spreading over the whole country while war raged in Europe. The upstarts took advantage of America’s diluted focus on the war in Europe which had been sold by Sigmund Freud’s nephew, his major coup in the new public relations industry, selling a skeptical nation that this would be a war to end all wars and it would make the world safe for Democracy. America’s rulers still managed to keep their eye on the ball, what was going on with their Cuban sugar interests, and used it to advantage and really dug in for a piece of Cuba. The American authorities blamed politics and leftist insurgents, which would justify intervention. In December 1918, an additional 1,120 Marines arrived to the Guantánamo naval base.

It was all so absurdist. The U.S. leasing this eastern port in Cuba, and it continued. The Americans had their Tiki Bar, a bowling alley, a MacDonalds and a Subway, it was a sleepy humid city in the South. They were groggily asleep poached in the sun. Which begs the question, why didn’t the military train the troops in Memphis one summer. That’d be rich. The whole setup defied the outer limits of folly. That Guantánamo was in the hands the military in this year of the L-rd. Absurd.

“I don’t know what I’m doing,” Miller said. “I do know that action is often the answer. You do something. You get out of the chair. Move those feet—things start to happen.”

At the time it all came down, Miller was on a diplomatic Mission to the Canary Islands, which is the kind of perk of being the leader of a rogue republic, carved out of the American northwest.  He immediately ordered warships down there, painted in the markings of the U.S. Military, went to Havana. At the same time they snuck into Guantanamo Bay, taking a page from the Cubans, they struck on the 4th of July, a good drunk holiday for patriots. Somebody was asleep, they were groggily asleep, poached in the sun, hungover from the picnics, beer and Dominos pizza. They guy at the major guardhouse had earbuds on and way looking at his rattle (that is, his cellphone).

A dry and lonely place—it was for example those facial muscles imposing a smile on his face, as to counter the mad broody genius look of when in composition mode, when in fact it best be the look of someone having sex with the clouds. Get some business cards printed and go out there boy.

GRAYDON MILLER

Dictator at Large

To be continued…

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Grady
Hollywood humorist Grady grew up in the heart of Steinbeck Country on the Central California coast. More Bombeck than Steinbeck, Grady Miller has been compared to T.C. Boyle, Joel Stein, and Voltaire. He briefly attended Columbia University in New York and came to Los Angeles to study filmmaking, but discovered literature instead, in T.C. Boyle’s fiction writing workshop at USC. In addition to A Very Grady Christmas, he has written the humorous diet book, Lighten Up Now: The Grady Diet and the popular humor collection, Late Bloomer (both on Amazon) and its follow-up, Later Bloomer: Tales from Darkest Hollywood. (https://amzn.to/3bGBLB8) His humor column, Miller Time, appears weekly in The Canyon News (www.canyon-news.com)