UNITED STATES—Stress, oh, stress is such a part of everyone’s life and no matter how much I attempt to compartmentalize the stress I encounter it always spills over and just leaves me wanting to climb into a box. I expect stress, but sometimes the level of stress I deal with when it comes to work makes me wonder WHY I am still here, why am I still doing this? Anyone who knows me, knows I hate things left unfinished or undone it just lingers, and that lingering drives me nuts. It makes it impossible for me to sleep, rest or to decompress.

I sometimes just go outside and scream to unleash that frustration I am feeling. You cannot keep it bottled up because it will literally drive you insane. I think my biggest issue is I do too much. I try to do too much because I don’t want the headache of having to deal with things during the minute down time I have. When I say that I’m being serious because I get one day off during the week, from the 2 jobs that I juggle not including taking care of a parent, working to land a teaching gig that will provide much needed financial stability and other family matters that just add to the worries, all while trying to fit in some personal time to elevate my screenwriting capabilities.

We all know a vast majority of the stress that most Americans encounter is a direct result of work. You hate your job, you don’t like the amount of money you make or you hate your boss or co-workers. Those things alone contribute to so much stress it is not even funny to say the least America. For me, I hate lazy co-workers because that means I have to take on the task of ensuring they do their job, in addition to doing my job. I don’t have the time for that and nothing boils my blood more than when people just sit back do nothing, but collect a paycheck.

I’m not busting my a** so you can sit and do nothing. This is why I wish some employers would just fire people. If they’re not doing their job, let them go, there is no need to keep them around, they’re not contributing or helping the company expand in any way, shape or fashion people. It sucks, but this is the biggest reasons so many employers lose some of the best employees because they don’t appreciate what they have when they have them in the company’s orbit. By the time the employee decides they’ve had enough, it’s too late for the employer to reel them back in.

If work wasn’t stressing me enough, add onto the factor that I just found out my oldest sister was diagnosed with COVID-19 and is now in isolation and I’m wondering if I should be quarantining as well. I mean I just quarantined for close to 10 days after getting over the Pink Eye, only to find out earlier this week I might have to have a serious surgery because of lingering issues from childhood that have reared its ugly head as an adult. That is scaring me senseless because any surgery is scary, but when you’re talking about delicate surgery involving the heart that is a whole new ball game America and it is something that opens the eyes greatly.

With that said I feel like I’m being beat up at all angles and I may have to do what I didn’t think I was capable of doing: take a break. I might just have to let work know you guys have to handle it; I have to take a step back and deal with personal things so that I’m at full capacity. You can only go so long working nonstop before you find yourself in that situation where you’re about to crash and burn, but you catch yourself in the nick of time. Life is full of curveballs, but at times, you can only dodge them for so long before you get struck by one, and by the time that happens, you realize it’s too late.