UNITED STATES—Sometimes things happen in life that make you open your eyes to things that you don’t think about. I really want to focus on giving flowers and kudos to all the people who are caretakers. A lot of people don’t understand that amount of work, stress and complete life adjustment that comes with being a caretaker for a loved one. We look from the outside thinking it is easy, only to discover once you are forced into that ROLE, oh, its a lot more work than I ever expected.
You could be the person that is running all the errands, and when I say all the errands I mean just that. You are taking care of the trips to the grocery store, the post office, the home improvement store, retailers, the bank, anything that the person you are taking care of needs, you become that person. Is it easy? It may feel like that in the beginning, but the longer that you’re in it, you realize it ain’t that easy.
On top of that, you have the doctor’s appointments, so you become privy to all the key information about their health, their prognosis and so much more. Then you have the preparation of meals/cooking, which can be taxing. Why? For most Americans, they eat 3 times a day, which means you are preparing meals 3 times a day, 7 days a week, that’s at minimum 21 meals.
What I am getting to is that you are always doing something as a caretaker? I hate to say it, but you have little to no time for yourself. When you hear some of the stories from caretakers, you realize, wow, your life has been completely upended in the process. Your life has become taking care of your loved one, and that doesn’t always get the respect and accolades that you should receive.
I’m starting to see that first-hand, as a result of having to care for one sick parent for nearly 6 months, and now having to care for another parent after a health crisis. You alter your work schedule as much as possible, your day off is no longer a day off, and any ‘me time’ that you previously had is very limited if any at all. This isn’t to complain it is more to open people eyes to see what caretakers endure so you understand if they don’t want to do something or they want to do something, you can understand why? Imagine going a month without being able to do anything for yourself. How about a year? Two years, this is what some caretakers are dealing with.
I haven’t even touched on the notion of having to change diapers or clean up after adults who are unable to do it themselves. That is a stressor in its own that is a tough thing to deal with on a daily basis. Imagine taking care of someone with Dementia and you’re having to watch them almost 24 hours a day because you fear them having an episode, trying to escape the house, having a fit of rage or them doing something that could potentially put them in danger.
Not easy, but I have a parent doing that, and I am starting to see the amount of work that comes with that and trying to assist that in the process and its beyond exhausting. Imagine if you’re working, and you’re having to miss work or consider other alternatives because your current work schedule doesn’t accommodate the needs of the person that you are caring for.
We need to have more things in place to help those who are caretakers. They do an unbelievable job that doesn’t get the respect and the gratitude that it should be receiving.
