My Sister Is A Recreational Dater

Ask Deanna!

Real People, Real Advice


Ask Deanna! Is an advice column known for its fearless approach to reality-based subjects!


Ask Deanna! is headquartered in Beverly Hills and can be heard every Sunday on KTYM AM 1460 at 3 p.m. in Los Angeles, Calif.


Dear Deanna!

I’m worried about my sister because she is the type of woman that has to be in a relationship.  She recently ended a six-year romance and after two weeks, she is already getting serious about someone new.  I think she needs to clear her head and realize she is on the rebound.  She has already told this man she loves him and I want her to slow down.  What can I say to her in order to spare her feelings but still get my message across?

Anonymous                St. Louis, Mo.           

Dear Anonymous:

It’s good that you’re concerned because this is your sister and you love her.  If she’s not being hurt and there aren’t any foul signs of abuse or cheating from this man, you should wait and see what happens.  However, it’s too early to see his true character and as an experienced dater, your sister should see the signs when they appear.  Share your honest feelings with her about slowing down and let her know she has your full support if things don’t work out.


Dear Deanna!

I am fresh out of a long term relationship and I really enjoy my single life and freedom. My girlfriends all envy me and now their boyfriends are accusing them of cheating and looking for men when they hang out with me. I am not going to water down my lifestyle right now and my friends are having a hard time with this. They say that I am acting loose as if I don’t have any morals.  I think they’re tied down to balls and chains and are jealous. Am I wrong?


Happy and Free          Online Reader


Dear Happy:

The men of your friends are insecure and obviously don’t know their women as well as they think. If your behavior is affecting them, you need to cool off and slow it down a bit when you’re around them. These are your friends and you need to still show some respect and regard for the differences in your relationships, or lack thereof.  At the end of the day, enjoy your life and realize that everyone is responsible for their choices. Yours just appears more fun right now.


Dear Deanna!

My spouse is trying to force me to quit my stable job of 10 years. I’ve never had problems and the benefits are great. The issue is a new department secretary. I have no interest in this woman but my wife only sees her as a young, energetic woman climbing the ladder. I’ve done nothing to make my wife insecure and she’s going crazy listening to office gossip. I’m not quitting my job and my wife still insists that I should. What do I do?


Paul R.                  Jacksonville, Fla.

Dear Paul:

If you’ve had the same job and same spouse with no issues, then something has been triggered with the arrival your new employee. If you’ve winked or wagged then you’ve given the office hens something to talk about. Office gossip is 99 percent gossip with a one percent smell of truth. Your wife has an insecurity issue that started before now and this is simply an excuse. You have a choice to fix your marriage, fix your job or fix yourself.


Deanna M.