UNITED STATES—It is a conversation I think we should be having more often. Why are some young adults not being introduced into adulthood a lot sooner? Well I guess that all goes back to the parents because if you don’t teach responsibilities at some age you’re going to have children who become spoiled brats if they don’t take on responsibilities.
No when I say responsibilities I am indeed referring to paying bills, but simple things like chores. I mean taking out the trash, washing dishes, cleaning one’s room, cleaning the house, cutting the lawn, purchasing groceries. I can go on and one, but this column it totally directed at my stepbrother, who has to be the laziest almost thirtysomething person I have ever seen.
I happened to be watching my stepmom’s house while she was out of town, and this kid baffles my mind. He does NOT clean any dishes, he doesn’t clean the bathroom, he doesn’t take out trash, he doesn’t clean the home, his bedroom smells to sky heaven and he doesn’t pay a single bill. I mean a single bill. I know what you’re thinking, does he have a job? Yes, but he still doesn’t pay bills. He recently just started purchasing his own groceries because he realized his mother was no longer going to do it.
However, when I was 18, I was buying groceries for the household I lived in. I didn’t have to wait until I was almost 30 to do that. I think I was more baffled that he didn’t pay his own cell phone bill, his mother was doing that. Like, what? You’re turning 30 in a few months, why the hell are you not paying your own cellphone bill and you have a decent paying job?
He has been spoiled and this is going to be a major problem for him because the moment HE HAS TO START PAYING BILLS it’s going to be a gut punch he never imagined and it is going to be a brutal reality check for him. Hell, when I got my first cell phone I was paying the bill and I know what some of you are thinking, are you jealous? No, it’s a clear sign of a young adult who wants the status of being an adult, but refuses to take the responsibility of being an adult.
If not NOW, then when will that transition occur? You cannot wait till forever to take a leap to being an actual adult, who has responsibilities and takes care of them. He wastes water to no means, leaves lights on nonstop, he just has no notion that your utilities are not free. It costs money to be able to hit a light switch, to be able to take a shower, to surf the internet and to do so much more. His laziness is becoming a massive hindrance for his growth potential because he thinks life is all about doing what he wants when he wants, but not being aware that there are responsibilities that become a part of life when you get older.
You cannot remain a kid the rest of your life and not learn how to take care of yourself i.e. paying rent, in addition to a host of other things. Parents at some point have to cut the cord and force their kids to grow up and take on the tasks of what it means to be an adult and not apologize for forcing their child to see life is no cakewalk. I guess that is the difference between the era that I grew up in and what these kids nowadays are used to. It is a norm to sit on one’s ass all day and surf social media and not work or look for a job on months end because one is collecting unemployment.
It is sad, but you should be forcing your child to get a job as soon as they can work if possible. Why? It teaches responsibility, it teaches one how to save money to purchase the things they want, it teaches many of the life skills one needs to succeed in life and understand you control and dictate the path you take. As a parent you cannot control that path for the child, let them fail and let them learn, that is the only way they can grow.
Written By Jason Jones