UNITED STATES—I have not had a good quality sleep in nearly 2 months. When I say that I’m being dead serious because it seems no matter what I do nothing works. I used to think it was a direct result of insomnia particularly because I used to work nights as an undergraduate and my sleep rhythm has never been the same America. However, at this point I just don’t know what it is that has caused my sleepless debacle.
Yeah, I work more than one job and that alone is a struggle so many people have NO CLUE about. Having to juggle a stressful as hell job and then turn around and work another job that is just as stressful if not worse does not help one’s sleep pattern. I’ll be the first to admit it, I am NOT a night owl, never have been never will be. I’m a firm believer that the early bird always catches the worm.
When I get up, I’m in the mode and I’m ready to get things done. I don’t like wasting time or worrying about trying to get things done and I don’t have to deal with babysitting or worrying if this person did this or did that. I like stuff to be completed and that might lead to some of the anxiety that I encounter, which might be a thorn in the issue with my sleep pattern. I will admit when I am excessively tired which rarely happens, that is when I achieve the best sleep. I can honestly sleep like 12 hours. However, I can only recall that transpiring when I was working like 12-16 hour days and when I got home I hit the bed and that was the end of it.
It has gotten so bad that I’ve starting purchasing essential oils like eucalyptus, mint and lavender hoping they will improve my sleep. Have they worked? Slightly and if they are indeed working I don’t know and I can’t recall if I’m being fully honest with you. I do believe a big issue is my left ear where for some strange reason I seem to lose hearing in at night or suffer from the ear feeling full and making it near impossible to find a comfortable sleeping position. That ends up causing me to toss and turn literally all night without any source of relief.
The only solitude I might get are those micro naps that I take on rare occasion during the day if I’m lucky. How lucky, I can sometimes rest for 20-30 minutes and it feels as if I slept for 5 or 6 hours. It is indeed crazy how the less you sleep it can sometimes feel like a super nap that you didn’t even realize that delivers just enough rest for you to rejuvenate for several more hours to power thru whatever task or tasks that you have at hand.
I have been in communication with an ear, nose and throat specialist to see what might be causing the problem in my ear. I have a good idea what might be the cause, but I can’t be 100 percent certain. Heck at this point, it has become a norm that I have just dealt with, but I have reached a point, where the lack of sleep is just making me tired beyond being tired. If I could make one wish it would be to have 24 hours of sleep without a single person contacting or bugging me about anything.
I just want to sleep and not have to worry about anything in life. I guess that is the thing about life, they always say you can sleep when you’re dead, but the problem with that is you won’t know you’re sleep at that point.